my eyes are shutting and i havent completed the revision for my cm2132 test. i have gone thru all the formulae but i havent memorised them. i figured tt i may not be able to sleep at all for today.
im upset today. im truly am. firstly it is because of an incident that occured while i was on my way to work which i wont mention. but till now, im still upset over it.
secondly, i guess i am not tt happy as i thot i was when i talked abt the test which i failed for lsm1302. i keep failing tests and i got no idea why. perhaps it is my own fault tt i skip lectures but HEY dun i make it up when i study so hard on my own. it is not my fault tt i cant ustand my HK or china lecturer's accent. and it is not my fault that they give such miserable notes and we can barely ustand anything. in fact in my own standards, i think i am hardworking because i bother to buy books and read them on my own. EXTRACT MY OWN INFORMATION WHICH ISNT LISTED IN THE NOTES. freak, can u just tell me why i keep failing? and wat upsets me was that i was reading thru my cm2132 notes and i was whining to myself cos there were so many formulae to remember. but then again, i told myself this is going to be the last year tt im gg to take this module and all my year 3 modules would be more specialised already and in fact i can sorta choose which aspect of chemistry i wanna specialise in. thou i do better for physical chemsitry, im still gg to choose inorganic chemistry bcos they are easier to comprehend and more logical. i like logical things more than usual stuff. I JUST CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE.
thirdly the stress is catching up on me and i dunno how to handle it. i feel screwed. i really do. perhaps like wat my fren said of herself, a pressure cooker. i feel like i am exploding anytime. right, go ahead and ridicule me. blame me for not attending lectures. im not trying to act like a cool kid by skipping all the lectures. but 8am lectures EVERY SINGLE DAY is killing me. i have to wake up at 6am and then wait for the forever-wont-come bus 188 and squeeze up there. thou i like it when my sch ends earlier than others, the pain of waking up at 6am is simply unbearable. being a late night person means tt i have to give up my late nights activities eg supper, magazine reading, preparing my sold auction items to post etc etc. BUT WHO THE HELL CARES?
and sometimes things really happen at the wrong time. i just cant take it tt sometimes we are being made fun of. timing do not coincide all the time and i am freaking sick and tired of it.
im sick of it, i repeat.
i dont like it as well and i didnt ask for it to happen.
im really upset i dare say. im so upset tt i cldnt eat my dinner well and i didnt protray my best form of customer service and i didnt interact much with my colleagues. i simply acted like a hermit, a recluse.
may i sleep by 4am tonight. FUCK the cm2132 test. FUCK the cm2102 test.
all of sudden, i wish to go back to my past.
we were born with innocence.
im upset today. im truly am. firstly it is because of an incident that occured while i was on my way to work which i wont mention. but till now, im still upset over it.
secondly, i guess i am not tt happy as i thot i was when i talked abt the test which i failed for lsm1302. i keep failing tests and i got no idea why. perhaps it is my own fault tt i skip lectures but HEY dun i make it up when i study so hard on my own. it is not my fault tt i cant ustand my HK or china lecturer's accent. and it is not my fault that they give such miserable notes and we can barely ustand anything. in fact in my own standards, i think i am hardworking because i bother to buy books and read them on my own. EXTRACT MY OWN INFORMATION WHICH ISNT LISTED IN THE NOTES. freak, can u just tell me why i keep failing? and wat upsets me was that i was reading thru my cm2132 notes and i was whining to myself cos there were so many formulae to remember. but then again, i told myself this is going to be the last year tt im gg to take this module and all my year 3 modules would be more specialised already and in fact i can sorta choose which aspect of chemistry i wanna specialise in. thou i do better for physical chemsitry, im still gg to choose inorganic chemistry bcos they are easier to comprehend and more logical. i like logical things more than usual stuff. I JUST CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE.
thirdly the stress is catching up on me and i dunno how to handle it. i feel screwed. i really do. perhaps like wat my fren said of herself, a pressure cooker. i feel like i am exploding anytime. right, go ahead and ridicule me. blame me for not attending lectures. im not trying to act like a cool kid by skipping all the lectures. but 8am lectures EVERY SINGLE DAY is killing me. i have to wake up at 6am and then wait for the forever-wont-come bus 188 and squeeze up there. thou i like it when my sch ends earlier than others, the pain of waking up at 6am is simply unbearable. being a late night person means tt i have to give up my late nights activities eg supper, magazine reading, preparing my sold auction items to post etc etc. BUT WHO THE HELL CARES?
and sometimes things really happen at the wrong time. i just cant take it tt sometimes we are being made fun of. timing do not coincide all the time and i am freaking sick and tired of it.
im sick of it, i repeat.
i dont like it as well and i didnt ask for it to happen.
im really upset i dare say. im so upset tt i cldnt eat my dinner well and i didnt protray my best form of customer service and i didnt interact much with my colleagues. i simply acted like a hermit, a recluse.
may i sleep by 4am tonight. FUCK the cm2132 test. FUCK the cm2102 test.
all of sudden, i wish to go back to my past.
we were born with innocence.
posted by Jo | 12:22 AM
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